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The Secret To Sleep Training Your Toddler


What Is Sleep Training For Toddlers

For many parents, their toddlers bedtime is the most challenging part of the day.

This is more likely to be harder if she has older brother and sisters who stay up later. The younger one at this point, feels left out and has a F.O.M.O if the rest of the family is awake while she has to go to sleep.

These feelings are understandable but she is still a baby and still needs 10 to 12 hours of sleep a night.

Sleep training a toddler means to gently and gradually change the sleeping behavior of your toddler, without using any medication, and without having to struggle every night to put your little one to bed. It is a process that will have to be gentle and will take patience and time.

But, if you will make the required changes, as well as staying consistent then nighttime will become a more peaceful and easy going time for the entire family.

At this time your toddler probably is taking only one nap a day. She is also likely to sleep as much as 12 hours a night without needing a middle-of-the-night-feeding.

You may have attempted to sleep train your little one in the past with either success or failure, but at this stage a toddler still has separation anxiety which means she will resist going to bed and she may wake up more often looking for you.

During this difficult period, you might need to experiment with different strategies to find the right techniques that help your toddler sleep better.

For example, some children go to sleep more easily when the door is wide open ( so they are able to hear you ); others develop self consoling habits, such as sucking their thumbs or rocking.

Your toddler might also have a special lovey, blankly or stuffed animal as a transitional object, which comforts her when you are not nearby. Anything that is soft, huggable and makes them feel safe.

My son likes to chew the nose of his teddy bear / blankly ( half teddy bear, half blanket – quite remarkable ) You can encourage your child to use a transitional object by providing her with a soft toy or blankly.

Sometimes it is tempting just to give up and let your toddler fall asleep in their tracks when they are overcome by exhaustion. But by doing so will only make it more difficult and challenging getting on a routine sleep schedule, and this is important for both daytime and nighttime sleeping.

Instead, watch the clock to see when she shows signs of sleepiness ( around 6 to 8 o’ clock ), then make that her regular bedtime.

Establish a bedtime ritual and if your toddler is able to understand, discuss this new rule with them. Whether you include a bath, story, or song, the routine needs to end with her quite, but awake, in her crib, ready for your good-night kiss before you leave the room.

What if my toddler is crying when it’s time for bed?

What first of all, do not do anything that will reward your baby for calling you in the middle of the night. Go check on her first and see if she is alright, tell her that you are close by if she really needs you; but do not turn on the light, rock her or walk with her.

You can offer her a drink of water but do not nurse or feed her and most certainly do not take her to bed with you. If she is going through separation anxiety, by taking her to bed with you will only make it more difficult to return to her own bed. Trust me.

When you do check on her, just try to make her as comfortable as possible. Also, makes sure she doesn’t have a temperature or is sick in any way.

Some problems, like ear infections can come on suddenly in the middle of the night.

Once you have made sure that there are no signs that she is ill, then go ahead and check her diaper, changing her only if she’s had a bowel movement or if her diaper is uncomfortably wet.

Make sure not to turn on the lights, and change her as quick as possible. Then quietly place her back in bed. Before leaving the room, whisper goodnight or a few comforting words about now how its time to go to sleep. If she continues to cry, just wait a few minutes before going in and comforting her for a short time only.

This is a very difficult time for both parents. I understand how it’s emotionally and physically exhausting to listen to your child cry, and you will probably respond with a variety of mixed emotions.

Remember that she is not deliberately being this way but only reacting to anxieties and stresses that are very natural at her age.

If you merely stay calm, and consistent from one night to the next she will soon be putting herself to sleep. Keep this objective in sight as you struggle through the “training” nights. Doing so ultimately will make life much easier for both of you.

Unfortunately, resistance during bedtime isn’t the only sleep struggle you might have with your toddler. Remember the very first time she slept through the night as a baby and you thought your sleep problems were over?

As the parent of a toddler, you now know the truth: she might go a few days, weeks or even months of sleeping through the night with no disruptions, then begin waking up almost as frequently as when they were a newborn.

A change in routine is the usual cause of nighttime awakening. Changing rooms or beds, losing a favorite blankly or stuffed animal, taking a trip away from home or an illness might all disrupt his normal sleeping behaviors.

While these are all valid reasons for her to wake up – it doesn’t mean for you to pick her up and take her to your room or into bed with you. She needs to put herself back to sleep, even if it means crying a bit first.

What if your toddler is used to getting lots of attention at night? In this case you will need to slowly retrain her.

Let’s say that you have been giving her milk whenever she wakes up in the middle of the night. It is time to change first to water and soon after stop it entirely.

If you have been picking her up, restrict yourself to calming her with only your voice from a distance. Above all, do not get irritated or angry with her if she continues to protest.

Show her kindness, even as you remain firm. It is not easy but in the long run it will improve your sleep as well as hers.

What to do if a toddler is climbing out of bed?

Toddlers are full of energy and curious and may soon discover that, with a bit of effort, they can climb out of their bed and have some fun around the room at night.

When will a toddler attempt to perform such maneuvers? In most cases, parents won’t have such issues until the age of 2 years old.

The motor skills of the baby have to be well-developed in order for them to be able getting their own weight over the bars of the bed.

So, if you have a toddler, you should watch out for such attempts between the age 2 and 3. What to do if your toddler is indeed trying getting out of the bed?

First, you need to take some precaution methods.

You will need to place a soft mat or rug next to the child’s crib so that it will reach something soft in case the young one does manage getting out.

Specialists suggest using a sleeping sack for your toddler, in the appropriate size. This will make getting out of the bed more difficult.

Transitioning to a bed

You should begin to use a bed instead of a crib by the time your child is 35 inches tall.

Transitioning to a regular or “big kid” bed can be hard for two different reasons; first of all, she is used to having the sides of her crib to keep her on her mattress.

Initially transitioning to a smaller mattress ( like the one from her crib or a twin mattress) on the floor makes more sense because she is probably going to roll out of her new bed anyway; better that it’s already on the floor right?

Over time the crib mattress can be replaced with a larger mattress if you choose, and then later on if you want, you can raise it up onto a frame.

The bed can be a toddler sized bed, or if she is comfortable in a larger bed, it is fine to move to her to a regular size bed.

The second difficulty with transitioning to a bigger bed involves getting her to stay on the bed. Consider using a guardrail to help keep her safe and secure while in bed.

At the very least, her room needs to be childproofed; a gate might be required at the door to prevent her from wandering around the house at night.

What if you co-sleep with your toddler?

In many cases, toddlers prefer the beds of their parents instead of accepting to sleep in their own bed. In this case, you should start getting them used to sleep in their own bed.

You will need to be patient and consistent during this process if you want to reach success.

You need to know that you have to make the toddler feel good in his own room, which also means to play games and do fun things in his or her room, even in the proximity of the crib.

This way, your child will associate the bed with something nice and fun.

After playing for a few days this way, select a night when you will put the toddler in his or her own bed and explain gently that he or she will be sleeping there.

There are high chances that your child will come to your room, several times during a night and for a good number of days.

Each time the toddler ends up in your room, patiently take him or her bad to the crib. Eventually, the toddler will get used to his own bed, just be calm and patient until this happens.

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There are quite a few methods to sleep train a toddler, so we are going to mention a few here, among the most popular:

  1. The withdrawal method
  2. Camping in the toddler’s room
  3. Positive reinforcement

This is suitable for toddlers that like having one of the parents around before going to sleep.

If you are used to sitting with your toddler until he or she falls asleep, you will continue doing so for a few nights, until you will gradually increase the distance between you and the child at bedtime.

So, you will gradually move to the end of the bed or on a nearby chair. The distance will be increased gently and in time.

This means to sleep in your toddler’s room on a mattress, for example, so that the child has the security and comfort of having you around.

This will allow him or her getting used to the bed faster. Just makes sure to explain to them that camping will only happen for a few days.

A child should always be rewarded for an appropriate behavior, including sleeping in his own room and bed.

Of course, the best moment to offer your toddler a reward is in the morning, not before going to bed. Just pick the right rewards for your toddler’s age without spending too much money on each reward.

You should not allow your child to watch TV or use any kind of electronics before bedtime.

Also, rough playing between dinner and bedtime is not recommended either.

Instead, try coming up with a good bedtime routine, which means that your toddler will have a bath, get cuddles, and enjoy a story before going to bed.

Let’s say that your toddler is happy sleeping in their own “big kid” bed, but the issue is that they get too much anxiety being alone in their room all by themselves, or if you have caught them a few times out of bed playing with their toys in the middle of the night, then you can make the choice to sleep with your toddler in the same room as you, ( not in the same bed.)

This means that you can put the child’s new bed into your room so that they won’t be so far away from you and you can makes sure they don’t get out of bed to play.

Eventually you can transition your toddler back to their own room once you feel that they are ready to.

When it comes to your toddler’s sleep just do the best you can, but do not feel bad if things do not always go as planned.

Yes, make an honest effort getting your little one to bed on time for naps and at nighttime. But as a parent you also need to set side any blame or worry you might feel if you are not doing everything perfectly.

There will be days and nights when your child does not sleep well, maybe because you have been too lax in keeping her in sync with her internal rhythms.

Or if your toddler spends time at child care or with a nanny, and you are simply not present to put her to sleep at nap time, forgive yourself and just makes sure that her caretakers understand and are trying to comply with your own preferences about how you want your child’s sleep schedule to be.

At home do not beat yourself up if your toddler goes to bed a little late for a night or two. Just get back on track as soon as possible and help her return to a normal sleeping routine.

Dealing effectively with your toddler’s sleeping problems is important, not only for your child but also because her sleep difficulties can interfere with our own need to rest.

Meeting your own sleep needs is important to effectively care for your toddler and the rest of your family. Chronically overtired parents also have a greater risk of becoming depressed.

Keep in mind that helping your toddler sleep can be one of parenting’s biggest challenges. But it can have an enormous payoff in terms of your child’s health in the future.

I hope this guide will help you as a parent and give you the chance getting a restful sleep at night by helping your toddler develop healthy sleeping habits.

Just do remember to be patient and don’t expect miraculous changes overnight. Sleep training and generating healthy habits take time while gentleness is one of the most important parts that will lead to success.

Remember that your pediatrician can be a great ongoing source of support, reassurance and advice. Additionally, many pediatric medical centers have individuals who are specialists in helping babies & children sleep better.


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Hi Sophia,

This information is very timely for my family. 

My daughter is struggling to train my granddaughter to go to bed at night.  There are no other children in the house to distract her.  She gets her bath at bedtime and that calms her down.  

The biggest issue is she wants to nurse to go to sleep.  She is two years old and weening increasingly during the day but still wants to nurse at night.   So of course she cries until her mommy gives in to get her settled down.  

I’ll share this article with her, maybe some of your suggestions might help. 

I wish you much success.

PLEASE REMEMBER TO ENCOURAGE SOMEONE TODAY!

Vanna Pearl

Hello there I am  father of a 3 years old boy and I having some problems with him, he is already sleeping in his own bed but He awake in the middle of the night and go to my bed and stay there with us I tried to sleep with him for a little while but he always woke up and go to my bed I feel He is winnig the batle and I dont know what else to do all the ways you wrote about in the post,  I had tried it but simply doesnt work please advice me what Can I do?

Hi Felix I am really sorry that your son keeps you up at night. My son is almost two years old and wakes up sometimes at night as well wanting to sleep next to me.

My advice is if he has his own bedroom you might want to shut and lock the door. Of course before you do this, when you put him to bed you tell him that its bedtime, it’s time to go to sleep, that you love him very much and will be down the hall but that he needs to rest his body here in his room like a big boy. When he is settled in, give him a kiss and tell him you love him then shut and lock the door from the outside. 

I also suggest that you invest in a baby monitor that comes with a camera. It will automatically come with night vision so you can see everything that goes on in your toddlers room even if the light is off. Put the camera is a place where he can’t reach it, but you can see him clearly. When you lock the door, you will hear him get out of bed and attempt to open the door. He might yell, scream and kick the door. He might even throw things in his room. That is why you need to make sure to secure the room before hand and not leave anything dangerous that he can throw and hurt himself or break something. You will be able to *view* your toddler from the baby monitor and see for yourself that he is perfectly fine, safe and unharmed but simply having a fit…. this is the best thing to do because after the second night he will have gotten the picture that night time is for sleeping in his own room.

You can even tell your toddler that you are able to *see* him from your room. You do not want to show him the camera though or let him know where it is just simply tell him that you can see him and you will know if he really needs you or not. Let him know that you will also be able to see if he is being naughty ( Ie: throwing his toys around or being loud ) so tell him that he should be a good boy and rest his body in his own bed.

Make sure you don’t cave in and go to him at all in the night UNLESS you can see that he needs you, that he hurt himself, that he is sick or about to hurt himself, or in any other emergency, but other than that DO NOT go to him because he is crying or calling for you. You will simply perpetuate the behavior and he will not learn how to sleep in his own bed. So make sure that you just keep a firm stance on what the rules at bedtime are. Toddlers get the point in a day or two. So don’t worry! 

Hi Sophia, What wonderful suggestions for Sleep Training for Toddlers. There are so many views on co-sleeping, own rooms from early babyhood etc. You have so many good ideas and I am sure that there are many parents who will benefit by reading this lovely post.

I had to (big boy sit, his words, not mine) my grandson on Saturday night. All went extremely well, we had story time but just as I was ending the story he realized that his favorite penguin that he always sleeps with, was missing. The hunt was on. I eventually had to ask for his help to come downstairs as the teddy I had found was just going to do the trick, I had the good fortune of looking on the windowsill behind the curtain and finding penguin and I had to sleep with teddy and he went to sleep with penguin. All was well that ended well. Just a bit later bedtime than usual. We both slept very soundly after that.

Oh no the missing lovey!!! I very much sympathize with you on that one. My son has misplaced his teddy bear blankey many times and it was the make or break of whether or not he would go to sleep or not !!! So when you say the hunt is on, you are not kidding! So glad you finally found your penguin and your “big boy” was able to sleep peacefully.

Great Post! This reminds me of being young. My internal clock  was like a Swiss time piece! At 8 o clock on the dot, guess who was out like a light?  Like you say my older sister got to stay up later and I wanted to be one of the cool kids but I physically couldn’t do it.

I think training your baby is very important because in the long run I think this will contribute to their sense of self discipline and self reliance. If they realize they can do something because you encourage them it will set you up to create stronger children who can take care of themselves which is what parenting is about right?

I have 4 children, all boys, and not one of them have ever gone to bed and fell asleep straight away. My youngest is 4 now and he still comes downstairs or gets out of his bedroom at least 5 times every night, it’s really tiring for my wife and me.

We have recently started watching a TV show called ‘Supernanny’ have you heard of it? Anyways we have picked up some great tips from the show that seems to be working and everything the show teaches us you have covered in this great post so I have bookmarked it so I don’t have to keep watching the show to see how to get my bit to sleep better.

Thanks so much for this and I will keep you posted about if it’s working or not 🙂

Hello again Sophia,

I can totally understand why kids have problems sleeping alone, I remember when I was a kid too and the thought of sleeping in my room scared me. I used pillows to create a fort around my bed so that the monsters wouldn’t be able to get to me. My mum came in in the morning and thought that I wanted to die by creating my own pillow coffin lol.

It’s weird but I think every sound is scary for toddlers at night and sleeping with them can actually help them get through that transition. Did you have problems when you were a kid too like me?

Hi Riaz, I do remember being afraid of the dark at night and frequently climbing into bed with my parents. I do not remember when I was an infant or toddler though… just childhood. I try to accommodate my son as much as possible without making things uncomfortable for myself. Sometimes it depends on the situation where sleeping with parents is a better choice than sleeping alone. Depends on the family though. 

I remembered that when my daughter at 2 years old, she fell down from her bed on the floor tile. It was about 1 metres high. Then her forehead turned to red and she started to cry. As you mention on your post that someone has to watch children while they are sleeping on playing things on the bed. In this case I had baby sister watching her but the accident still happened.

I had a similar incident happen to me except I was the one who was supposed to be keeping an eye on my son. Fortunately the ground was carpeted really thick and he didn’t cry, just sort of let out a yelp. It happens sometimes, but you should always be mindful of baby even when they are sleeping.

I had no issues wtih my child before. However, this really made me think that not only they must be trained in their sleep; but we need it too. I have noticed humanity does not really place the importance of the sleep cycle. I being one of those people I am mentioning; am concerned with this in an early age of adulthood. People….get your sleep-in order!!!

I have a 2-year old son and luckily my little guy sleeps like a charm. Always has from when is was around 6 months old. He does however, needs his blanky, otherwise he will not go to bed.

Some friends of mine aren’t so lucky and some of them barely get some sleep at night. I’ll point them to your article!

Sometimes we get blessed with a really good sleeper, and they go to bed with no qualms since day one. Sometimes we get blessed with a little one who needs extra TLC at bedtime and a little more nurturing and guidance at bedtime. Either way, I hope I can help out parents who have babies who need help going to sleep more often than not. 

Hi Sophia, you have what I needed! I tried to sleep train my baby but I was exhausted after third day of trying. husband didn’t help much and didn’t want our baby to cry to sleep, so we ended up co-sleep. I think I would consider to try again with all of your useful tips! I love the idea of camping, Christmas would be a good time to try. You are a great mum!

Hi Emily – you don’t have to throw in the towel. You can always sit down with your husband and discuss some of the things I went over here, maybe come to an agreement? Then you guys can decide on the day to start the training, that way you are both on the same page. Trust me, the crying will only be a few days if you don’t mess it up by bringing baby to sleep with you. Whatever you do, do not cave! You got this! It will be so much easier when you are able to see your own toddler becoming accustomed to the sleeping environment intended for them. Remember that when your toddler is sick, its okay to the bend the rules and let them sleep with you.  You can always re-sleep train them afterwards. 

It is not easy to make a toddler go to bed for 😴 sleeping.  Especially if the toddler is an active child like my youngest daughter,  ha.. ha.  She will want to put a color pencil and a child magazine instead of closing her eyes and start sleeping. Your tips are useful to create a condusive environment for sleeping.  You are right that we must be patient.  Sometimes I have fallen asleep earlier than her because I am very tired 😁.

Hi Sophia,

Oliver is lucky to have a discerning  Mum like you.  I am sure he will grow up to be a calm and contented boy as long as you nurture him, steering him gently on the journey of life.

Yes, it is known that babies suck their tongue and love to be comforted.  I think it helps them feel secure. Love, the blankly!

Personally, my son was only sick with a water infection caught from another baby. He was sick for 3 weeks and he passed the bacterial infection on to me!…Fortunately we both rallied and the situation did not happen again…

I hope to read more interesting articles from you.

Yes, I love being a mommy and making sure my son is a calm and contented boy like you said. I appreciate your comment, thank you.

Thank you, Sophia, for sharing your experience sleep training your son. I have two little girls of my own and they are a handful, even now that they are accustomed to bedtime. I always find that they respond well to bedtime being systematic, to the point that it’s almost ritualistic. Activity after dinner, wind down with talking about whatever they want (usually toys), get them clean and tuck them in. It always helps to be cheerful! Again, thanks for sharing, Sophia!

Great article with some really helpful tips! It’s been awhile for me, but I still remember how difficult it could be to transition the toddlers into their own beds. As infants, they slept with me. I breastfed them and it was most convenient for me to stay in my own bed. It was a precious time that I’ll always treasure. But when it was time to move out… omigosh. The greatest trick I discovered at that time was putting one of my own nightgowns into the kiddo’s bed. Not clean- one I’d slept in for a couple of nights. It was a source of comfort to her when she could smell me there in the night, as well as being a kind of blanket to cuddle with as she slept. 

That is a really good tip. When my son was in the NICU I was told by the nurses to leave behind a shirt that I had worn a few days, unwashed. The scent from my shirt was supposed to be soothing to my newborn son. Nowadays when I am holding my son, he will bury his face in my neck and inhale deeply.

You are hitting so many points that most parents went through or are going through with their kids and it’s awesome how many ways we can change the routine and make things differently. This article is very well written and it will definitely help many women looking for ways to help their babies sleep better at the appropriate times. Thanks again for sharing.

Thanks Andrea. I just want parents to know that in regard to setting limits at bedtime with their toddlers; that there is a big misunderstanding between traumas vs disappointments. Parents feel guilty that they are somehow “traumatizing” their toddlers when they don’t succumb to their demands at bedtime. 

Usually its the toddler who is running the show because the parents are afraid they are going to do some sort of psychological damage. If you just know that you meet your child’s everyday needs; food, love, bathing, safety, etc….. you are a good parent all around then don’t worry about setting limits at bedtime

When your toddler figures out how to be comfortable and sleep by himself all night long without needing you, he gets a huge burst of self confidence in himself. It is a huge milestone. Remember that and allow it to happen for him. 

I really like the idea of slowly moving yourself away from your toddler to get them used to sleeping by themselves. Thank you for the detailed way that this can be done with success. I have two friends that have both recently had children. Baby number 1 sleeps through the night with no issues and baby #2 wakes up at all hours crying and crying. Like you mentioned above, sometimes it can be that the parent is not around during the day to monitor naps and such. I think that is exactly the case with baby #2. Both parents work full time and the baby is cared for full time by the grandmother. I’ll have to pass all this info along to baby #2’s parents! Btw, your son Oliver is adorable!

Thank you! The slowly moving yourself away method is useful when your toddler has their own bedroom and you are trying to get them used to their own space. For me however, my son and I share a room so its more of not allowing him to call the shots in terms of sleeping right next to me as apposed to his own bed which is right next to mine. Its perfectly reasonable that he makes his requests because he’s a toddler, its up to me to establish boundaries while still meeting his needs for food, love and things like that. You don’t have to give in to every demand of your toddler or else they won’t know about establishing boundaries. 

Great advice on how to put a child to sleep. I don’t yet have a child of my own, but when I think of the experience of having to watch the first one cry, it makes me a bit anxious in reality. LOL. So I defintely understand what first time mothers would feel. But you’ve provided such a comforting and reassuring solution, and it’s really going to be a matter of time before both parents and child become used to the anxiety battle.

You really got some nice psychological tricks going on here. It’s really true that when you do some great exciting stuff around the toddler’s crib, it leaves great memories on his mind, and will eventually start loving his own room. Never really thought of it that way.

I learned so much reading this article. Thank you very much for sharing.

Hey Sophia, nice post. I wish your info was around when my son began his toddler stage; it would’ve saved his mom and I a lot of grief. I have a question, what do you recommend when it comes to toddlers who won’t stay in their own bed; is this something that you’ve dealt with? 

Your post was an awesome read and I believe that it can be the key to helping many new parents who are having trouble. Keep up the good work!

Hi there, in regards to a toddler who won’t stay in their own bed it really depends on the circumstance. If the toddler has their own bedroom, maybe you should consider putting up a gate at the door that your toddler cannot climb over. You  can also purchase a sleep sack for your toddler which will make climbing out of bed more of a challenge. Most toddlers just go to sleep.

Oh my, this takes me back. 🙂 I can relate to several things here from the days when our son was a toddler. One thing that you talked about that I remember we did was to learn his preferences and go with them. They often went through short stages and then on to the next, so no worries about him becoming dependent on one thing.

Also, when he got to the big bed stage, he came out to ours every night at around the same time for several weeks. We let it run it’s course and soon he slept all night in his own bed. In general, he was a good sleeper, and we were lucky.

My nephew’s son is a whole other story, so I’m going to bookmark this and past it to him and his wife to check out. Thanks for the great tips and info! 🙂

vThanks for the article! My son is 11months now and I am going to sleep train any time soon. I want to use HWL method by Susan Urban
but I was wondering is he’s not too old for this. After reading your text I believe it may work even easier than I expect! Fingers crossed.

Your welcome 🙂 Whatever sleep training method you decide to go with, just make sure you don’t switch up and change the game plans. Toddlers will use any opportunity to get out of sleeping in their own bed if they can help it. Being consistent will make a considerable difference

Hi Karen, while I do appreciate you sharing my article, I am not sure if this can help with teenagers. Teenagers are almost adults in the sense that they shouldn’t still be waking up several times in the night trying to sneak in bed with you, like a baby wants to do. Babies are very small, they still sleep in cribs and their ability to communicate is limited. I would suggest searching for something more related to adolescents.

My granddaughter will be 3 next month and, while she is a good sleeper the majority of the time, she does occasionally have some issues. I also have an 18 month old grandson who does tend to fight his sleep sometimes. You have given some really great suggestions on how to handle the common issues associated with toddlers and their sleep habits! I’ll be sure to share this article with my sons!

Oh I am so glad you found some helpful information here. All children are different, some are just born better sleepers than others. If you have a child or baby who doesn’t sleep well, it doesn’t mean that they are a “bad baby” it just means you need to help them learn the skill of sleeping a little bit more. Tonight was especially trying in terms of putting my son to sleep, he just kept trying to climb out of his bed into my bed and I just remained firm but gentle, “No Oliver, it is time for bed” I know he understood me. He cried and cried as if it was the end of the world but I sat there next to his bed, and I rubbed his back and sang a few songs. Eventually he went to sleep.

Hi Sophia you have alot of great information here and I wanted to share in how cute your baby is also. I have 3 sons, all nearly 10 years apart 13- 30 and each child had their own sleeping patterns. Each was different when it came to bedtime but all were content maybe because of being breastfeed. My big boys, I feel I may have been really controlling when it came to their bedtime and had a couple of upset moments but my last child I brought up differently to his bigger brothers as my youngest child was born in the years of my spiritual awakening, I learned more about the law of attraction and the power of creating in the vortex and knew my vibration and thinking had a big impact on how my children would grow up. My last child was very content and at peace and still is, because I was. My plunket nurses suggested alot of what you provided here but I found Ester Hicks suggestions in 2010 bought the change needed for my bedtime conflicts when I did have one. This was the clip that changed my whole thinking. Vortex first Ester suggests and then…. great advice for me as a mother. https://youtu.be/_oQpYrVKV-E

I love Ester Hicks! She is a really great speaker. I am very new at the LOA, and just getting my feet wet with learning all about the ins & outs and how to focus on *nothing*, how to let go of resistance, how to just *be* and *let be* – I am sure this all comes with a lot of practice to make things “effortless” as she describes. She does make it sound easy sometimes. She says “get into the vortex and THEN talk about the issue of going to bed” my son is too little to talk about issues with you know what I mean? I do want to learn how to get into the vortex, and I do need to practice on meditating because I know it is really important in terms of manifesting what I want. It is also very important for me to be able to raise my child as content as yours is. I feel very inspired by your comment and I appreciate the link you sent me. I listened to it twice already. Thank you.

Hi Sophia, I enjoyed reading your article. As I was reading, I began to wonder if sleep training at an early age could affect someone later in life. I do not have any kids, but I remember when I was very young (4-5 yrs old) I had very bad separation anxiety, and my parents would often let me sleep in their room. As you were saying, I guess that didn’t work well in the long run. I used to have pretty bad insomnia, and I still get it occasionally. I’m curious about if my lack of toddler sleep training could have contributed somehow. Do you know?

Hi Matthew, thank you for your question. I am not a doctor but I do know that 4 to 5 years old is not a toddler. A toddler is 1 to 3 years old and I know that separation anxiety happens mostly when babies are 9 months old to about 3 years old. If you were 5 years old and still had seperation anxiety, that could be a problem coming more so from factors that were going on at your house at the time. Were your parents always traveling and left you in the care with someone else? I know you were most likely not neglected or anything like that because you say your parents let you sleep next to them. Sleep training happens as early as 6 months and should be established by the time a child is 3 I think. Like I said, I am not a doctor with a Ph.d but I do have a degree in Early Childhood Education, and what I know about children is that whatever external factors are going on in a child’s life, often will have an impact on their inner / emotional / mental stability. How is your relationship with your parents now? Are you close? You might want to inquire with your folks about your childhood history, but more so in terms of when you were an infant. You might ask them if they attempted to sleep train you when you were 6 months or a year old. You might also ask them if you were ever left in anyone else’s care and would cry for them. Sometimes parents will feel really guilty about things and they will certainly confess to get it off their chest and to make sure you are alright and not really affected by whatever they feel they weren’t able to give or provide you with. You never know, by speaking with your parents about your childhood sleep history, might open some clarity in you and magically alleviate your insomnia. Like a “breakthrough” or something. I hope this helps!.

Great information!
I have a toddler currently, he most of the time goes to sleep without a fight, BUT when he doesn’t go to bed right away it seems to be an all night process of getting my little guy to bed! I will most definitely try some of your pointers!
Thanks so much for sharing your knowledge!

Your welcome! And me too! I know when my son is over-tired, to the point of “no return” when I try to pick him up & take him to bed, he will just let his body hang back like dead weight. When it comes to toddlers, its important not to let them stay up too late. When it is bedtime, you should seize the opportunity to put your toddler to sleep before that lethal second burst of toddler energy kicks in. Before they become hyperactive, goofy/cranky and hard to manage.

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